EVERYTHING is described in the game.

This isn't for any event (except in the past). I was browsing around and remembered that I made 2 games here before the site got the actual game submitting form and game lists. Might as well add them now.

you are a very man and you are going to your favorite restaurant
the thing is, you have to be wearing a fancy hat to get in!

theres been a word lately that theres hat bandits in the highways and
you have to go just through those ways to get there!
whack those pesky hat robbers into oblivion and go eat your hat food!!

(the only way to beat the game is to rapidly mash the punch button to fend the bandits off. 90% of the time it will glitch though and you're better off trying to [bad metaphor] a [bad metaphor] than beating this thing)