So a friend of mine started talking to me about all the insane things there are to find on GameJolt. I've encountered this site before, but never paid it much heed; it seemed mostly like a game hosting site where random people just upload whatever. Of course, upon reflection, that pretty much guarantees that there is a lot of incredible stuff to be found there.

So, after watching the trailer for Dress Up Cat, I went wandering around the site. And it wasn't long before I found NINTENDO WORLD 2.

NINTENDO WORLD 2 (ex) is a first-person shooter with a difference, and that difference is REAMS OF OVERWROUGHT DIALOGUE AND MELODRAMATIC MUSIC. All dialogue is expressed to you in the form of dialog boxes that you have to click the "OK" button to advance.

The game begins by introducing you, the player, to Barry, your constant companion and health bar. The first thing you see when you are given control is a statue of yourself (you are the saviour of Nintendo World after all -- see the original Nintendo World for details, presumably), and a 2D billboard of Link from Ocarina of Time, who gives you his sword and tells you that Nintendo World is in danger. Passing a defeated Mega Man lying on the ground, you take out a bunch of enemies and then fight an enormous ShyGuy, who is so mad at his defeat that he destroys the seven power stars blah blah whatever.

The cutscene that follows should win a Pulitzer. Seriously, it literally took me 15 minutes to get through this cutscene because I had to savour each line of dialogue. MARIO appears and tells you that, because of Giant Shy Guy's actions, Nintendo World has been DESTROYED. SAD MUSIC plays and ALL IS LOST and MARIO SHEDS A SINGLE TEAR

"Sorry...it's just that...Peach...Pikachu.............Yoshi........."

Mario then pulls out the startling revalation that "Nintendo World is not the only world in the VG Universe! Or as you humans know it: The Video Game Universe...", going on to explain that "The First world of them all it's the ATARI WORLD... It was created in 1977, in human time, of course...because for us is the beginning of all time...1977 is known as year 0 in the VG Universe..." and then there's SEGA world and uhh Animetro World? And oh by the way Mario is only still alive because he is the keeper of the ORB OF NINTENDO and you need to get the other ORBS OF FORCE from Pac-Man and Sonic and incidentally there's an ANTI VG Universe which "...is the opposite of the VG Universe: were ALL Villians live in chaos..." oh and you already have the ORB OF ANIMETRO because you defeated the BLACK LEGION in NINTENDO WORLD 1 and the Mario gives YOU THE ORB OF NINTENDO, THE ONLY THING KEEPING HIM ALIVE AND HE SCREAMS "IT DOESN'T MATTER!!! ALL HEROES SHALL BE READY TO DIE...I'M READY TO GIVE MY LIFE FOR JUSTICE AND PEACE OF THE VG UNIVERSE!! BARRY, PLEASE HELP THE HERO IN HIS TASK!!!!!" OH MY GOD BARRY THE HEALTH BAR HELP ME IN MY NOBLE QUEST

but then of course it turns out that Pac-Man lost the ORB OF ATARI in a nasty divorce and he gives you a LASER GUN and oh my god THIS GAAAAME.

NINTENDO WORLD 2 EX, EVERYBODY. GOTY.

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